Sociopathic people aren’t just serial killers and violent criminals. The fact that we think they are is the very reason why we don’t realize that we are surrounded by them. A sociopathic person has no conscience, experiences no shame, and can pretty much do anything at all without guilt or remorse. Rarely will a sociopath have been diagnosed as such because unless it serves them to be a victim, they don’t ask for help in that way. They don’t seek mental health treatment, because they don’t think there is anything abnormal about themselves, in fact, they think it’s the empathic, emotional, compassionate person who needs mental health care.
In reality, the empath is the one who gets help because they suffer so much from the abuse of the sociopathic people in their lives. If it wasn’t for the empath seeking help, maybe we wouldn’t realize that we really are surrounded by sociopaths.
People who are compassionate and empathic suffer much in this world because the whole world has been designed by sociopaths for sociopaths. If you’re not a sociopath, you may find it very uncomfortable to be here and to witness the abuse of the planet and all of the creatures on it, including humanity. It may sound hopeless but there are things you can do to empower yourself and to identify and get away from the most abusive, sociopathic people in your own life which will enable you to be better equipped to understand your own feelings and to contribute to making the rest of the world a better place for yourself and thereby everyone else. It’s time to take back the power from the sociopaths.
7- sociopathic people are charming The sociopath is not an outwardly angry, hateful person. If they were, their manipulation wouldn’t work. The whole method of operation is that they are likeable, pleasant, alluring people. They can be charismatic and engaging. While empathic and compassionate people tend to be more balanced in their feelings, feeling a range of emotions, sociopaths may have a more limited range of “feeling” because they control their outward appearance. There may be subtle hints of being a sociopath like being skeptical of other people, not trusting anyone, or claiming that everyone is either a thief or out to get something from you. This is what they are and since they don’t have the ability to sympathize, they think everyone is like this. There is a saying that if something is too good to be true, it usually is. This phrase was probably said by a sociopath.
6- sociopaths are cold Like a reptile who hunts, kills and eats it’s prey with no emotion, no remorse or respect for the process, sociopaths are cold, heartless, ruthless, shameless. There is no point in trying to appeal to their humanity because they don’t have any. Unlike most empathic people who can put themselves in another person’s shoes and choose to act with compassion, sociopaths do not have the ability to sympathize. They cannot put themselves in another person’s situation. There is no point in trying to get a sociopath to see things from a merciful heart because they simply are not capable.
5- you can’t hurt them You may feel afraid to speak your truth, afraid to leave them, afraid to hurt their feelings, but you can’t, because they don’t have them.
4- you feel like you can trust them and you don’t know why. Sociopathic people will never give you a bad or creepy feeling. You can tell them your deepest desires and feelings and you will never have the feeling you’ve said too much or you shouldn’t trust this person. Sociopaths will use everything you say against you in one way or another. Seeming to be trustworthy is a big part of their M.O.
3- they don’t want you to be ok, or fine or good. They need you to need them so they will look for all kinds of ways to be valuable to you. If you are good enough without them, they will create drama for you to need them somehow.
2- they are masters in drama. When we get close to the truth and we confront the sociopath with their behavior, they either get angry or cry crocodile tears in order to throw us off their trail and distract us from revealing their lies.
1- there’s no “there” there. If you are empathic, when you are engaged in conversation, you are able to sense how the other person feels. When you are talking with a sociopath, there’s nothing there behind their words. There’s no feeling, no emotion. Everything a sociopath “feels” is calculated. They only emote when it serves them. They have learned appropriate behavior for every situation and they may appear to have feelings but if you are an empath, you will not feel any feelings coming from them . You may see tears, crying, smiling, laughing, etc. with your eyes, but you will not feel the corresponding emotions because they are not there.
Yes, it is subtle and we don’t want to believe that we are the empath in a sociopath/empath dynamic. We would prefer to believe the facade that we are being presented, but as long as we go along with the sociopath’s charade, we are continuing to suffer from the abuse.
The most empowering thing you can do for yourself is to know how you feel. Sit with your own feelings and practice labeling your own feelings when they come up. (Make the statement out loud in your mind. ie: I feel sad, angry, happy, afraid, etc.)
The sociopathic world we live in teaches us that our feelings are nothing more than obstacles to productivity. In fact, the opposite is true. Our feelings create our reality. Becoming a master of your feelings will change your life.
The second most important thing you can do to empower yourself against sociopaths is to set boundaries. Sociopaths don’t think that what they do is abusive. To them, their behavior is normal. When you are involved with a sociopath and you feel uncomfortable with the way you are being treated, you need to tell them that what they are doing is not ok with you. Be specific. Use simple terms and say exactly what it is you are not ok with. It is not likely that the sociopath will stop the behavior completely, they will most likely modify the behavior in some way to make it look different, but they are still manipulating to get a result from you. Once you have said that something is not ok with you and the other person continues to do it anyway, you can confirm that abuse is happening. You asked them to stop, they didn’t – that is abuse. Whether they agree with it or not, it is abusive. You have every right to remove abusive people from your life.
Once you are free from abusive people, you will feel happier, more empowered and your world will look completely different than it did before.
It takes courage to stand up for yourself and to let go of the people and things you once loved. When you realize that you are worth the time and effort, you will bring people into your life that feel the same way toward you and who will love you and treat you with kindness and respect.