Things aren’t always as they seem.. things don’t always turn out the way you would expect. For example, when it comes to love. Everyone I know wants to love and be loved. Yet within the attempts to gain such love, there creeps in feelings of manipulation and fear and thoughts of inadequacy and insecurity. It sometimes takes many efforts to co create a relationship before one finally realizes that the most important love you can get and the most rewarding love there is, is self love. The loyalty to ones self and the ceasing to abandon ones values and principles when engaging in a relationship with another person. It seems that when we are desperate to feel the love and approval of another person, we slip into a habit of accepting feelings that cause us pain and contort us into a smaller version of ourselves. Contrarily, if we love ourselves and set firm boundaries on what we will tolerate in the form of behavior and treatment, we raise the bar and raise the level of respect we have both for ourselves and for other people. Setting boundaries not only shows respect for oneself, but affords the other party an opportunity to look within themselves and see what it is that causes them to feel and act the way they do. Self love is a mirror in which everyone can reflect what blocks need to come to the surface and clear.