I really feel like shit today
There’s not much more about it I can say
I’m so depressed and insecure
I’m feeling sick and inferior
It’s almost like my dad is here
Making me feel stupid
Wishing I could disappear
How does this work, now, anyway
I don’t have to deal with abuse every day
Yet still I manage to be depressed
I still have feelings like being oppressed
I guess it’s because I was down so long
It takes some time to do things wrong
And not feel like I deserve abuse
The guilt and shame is now in use
I’m the one who’s accusing me now
I’m the one keeping the critical voice alive
It’s me because I know nothing else
Like a fighting dog who can’t receive love
After being tortured his whole life
I’m that dog
I don’t know love
Even when it’s standing right in front of me
I’m learning, though
It’s really slow
This emotional recovery