Surrendering 

In my journey

I have found

That running away from the pain

Contributes to it

I’m considering surrender

I’m listening to what it is telling me

It’s painful to hear

But I’m starting to realize that

Its message tells me how to relieve it

It says 

Trust what you know

It’s so hard to trust myself

I’ve been told a story and made to believe it for all this time

Feeling it wasn’t really true

This separation of ego and self

 I’ve thought it and felt guilty about it that now I don’t know how to live without it

The critical voice

The self abuse

The hatred toward myself every day

Attracting it and

Allowing it from others

In subtle ways that open the door for big mistakes or rather, course corrections

Banging my hard head against the wall

Because I can’t seem to learn any other way

But the hard way

Why 

Because I if don’t believe in myself

I don’t make room for anyone else to, either

And I continue alone

How do you stop that cycle

How do you realize you’re infinitely worthy of love

Just do it, I guess

Don’t give up

Keep taking the steps down the road and see where the journey leads

Don’t fight it and don’t give up

Because life hands you back a reflection of what you’re asking for

If you are afraid of what’s good because you don’t feel good enough, well then you will never feel like you have anything good

If you give up trying to be happy, you give up on yourself

Because no one can make you happy but you.. This is your creation

Don’t fight the painful lessons life offers you. You’ll be fighting until you learn what they are teaching you about yourself

Don’t quit trying to be your greatest version. That really is the whole experience. 

I guess

That’s where I am at at this point of my journey, anyway. 

I’m never going to be a master as long as there is something to learn

So I surrender 

No more running

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